Crazy?

I think it may be official...I am crazy...ill...

I took my boy to seminary today (yay! Boy!) and when I got there, was going through the usual battle of to walk or not to walk..wondering how cold I would get waiting in the car, or if I would have to cave and go inside...when I saw that the sidewalks were not shoveled!

I confess that I felt a thrill...a shiver of excitement. I shoveled and shoveled and shoveled...it was just so fun. I got to exercise, a nice full body work out, and I was serving others! Yippee!

I wish you could have seen the look on my boy's face...as he told me I was sick...incredulous doesn't quite do it!

p.s.
The video camera is broken, and off to the company to hopefully be repaired under warranty...so no pictures for awhile...

For your education....

So, a member of the family was ill this morning. Actually, he has been ill for the last week, but we were trying to get him through it without a doctor's appointment. Alas, this morning the illness became acute.

He had terrible ear pain and that was his main complaint. But, as I looked at him, I realized that things were worse than that. He was pasty, red-eyed, and just sick looking. So, I called the doctor's and off we went.

The poor boy had bronchitis....sinus rhinitus...and and acute double ear infections...complete with a completely educational moment for both of us. He had "Bullous Myringitis....! I guess that means that his poor inflamed ear drum had blisters on it.

So this is what his nostrils looked like...swollen almost shut from inflammation.
And this is what his eardrum looked like, though he had more than one blister. (the doctor showed me)
And the image on the right...what his lungs were doing.

So..three different medications..rest and fluids...and we might keep him healthy for a week or two.

So...I think I have three hens laying! I should have four....but I have a crowing rooster instead. My boys have promised to do him in for me...but they haven't yet. I was letting it go, because he is just a handsome fellow. But then he attacked my girly...so I am not feeling so warm and fuzzy towards him now. More on that later.

They are very productive!
So, back when I was feeling rather productive....I found a bureau beside the road...and we need bureaus! So I sent the big boys and a friend down to fetch it. Actually, it was while the family was down and out with the flu that I worked on this.

I did not want to spend money on handles...and I really did not like the ones that were on it....so I crocheted some up! I like the way it looks like a face!

See...happy faces...for my big girl!

Hello!

Hi! I have not felt very bloggy lately. Life has also been very very busy. Excuses? Of course!

Really, though, life has been very challenging, so that I have not felt like I have extra energy, mental, or otherwise, to put into doing fun things, like blogging.

However, I have been missing it, and I recognize that perhaps it is a good way to take time for myself, when things are rather busy, tense and overwhelming.

(Oh...you want to know why things have been overwhelming? Well, it seems that we cannot keep our household illness free for more than ten days...literally...bunch of sickos! And we have had some mental health issues coming to a head. This involved some very uncomfortable and sad climaxes...Good news, these events have led to some powerful commitments to getting help and pursuing change. So...I think we are on a better path, but I am weary of the trying to get there.)

So, for today....a commitment to blog...I am busily taking pictures to liven things up. See you again soon!

Fall

I love fall! I know, I know...I have already mentioned that. One of the things I love about fall is apples. I love apples, and have raised a clan of apple lovers. I went and picked up some gorgeous drops...for next to nothing, and my children ate through 1/2 a bushel in a week. I helped, of course.

We have eaten through more since then! (does that count as gluttony?)

Last week, my dear mother brought me two bags, each a 1/2 bushel, that I promised myself would become applesauce to go to the cupboards. So, Saturday, in spite of my sore throat and fatigue(Oh my...the drama!) I went to work.

This is several batches...warming while waiting to go into jars.

We had to buy a new canner, as the one that I have had forever, as a hand-me-down, sprung a leak last year. The one that we got is a beast! I was almost afraid it was too big, but it did not take too long to come to a boil, and it held 9 jars at once!

Yummy. I have a goal to get four more bags and do the same. That means, that at an average of 5 dollars a 1/2 bushel, and a 9 jar yeild from a bushel, I will spend 10 dollars to get nine jars of applesauce and have apples to spare. So, if I succeed in getting some more apples, for 30 dollars spent, I will have 27 jars of applesauce set aside for those cold winter days. We could have two jars a month...and it will last a whole year! (Thanks Mom and Dad for your contribution!!!)

Fall fun

Well...with some help and encouragement from a friend, I have learned a new hobby! I was very skeptical and resistant, cause I really want to be a quilter, but free yarn, free lessons, and a fun visit were too much to resist.

You can see that I have seamed one side, and made a pom-pom (cause I could not wait!)

Here the victim shows off her much anticipated hat...(still undone)

And at last...a finished project!

I am basically pleased, but anxious to try a new pattern...without seams. Guess that means I will have to learn to "knit in the round." (Look how I have already picked up some terminology!)

Still alive

Well...I am not saying a word of defense....

OK...just a few...

Do you know what has taken me so long to blog? The camera was in the basement....and I could never remember it when I was down there, and I just could not motivate myself to actually make a special trip! Ridiculous, no?

So...forgive the repitition, but I am irritated at the lack of a decent camera. (I am hoping that Santa will bring one...or do I want a dishwasher...aarrgghh....) At any rate, I have found the best succes with the Video Camera when I use the multi-shot function, and out of 10 pictures, I can sometimes get 1 that is worth posting. So, from Family Reunion and the surrounding days, I took 269 photos. I have been culling them, and am down to 177. See...It REALLY is hard to find the time to devote to this!

Here is a really cute chipmunk we saw on our walk to the milking barn, at an August family Reunion. And a really cool fungus, that I think Twitch caught on film! (Nicely done, actually) Can I just tell you how much I love brown cows? I ADORE them. So very sweet.I have more pictures from that August Weekend, and the camera is fully charged, and upstairs, so I will try to be more diligent, for those who care to keep up with my dreary life.

(that was a joke...my life is not dreary...though I don't often share the more exciting adventures)

Hey, just for kicks, perhaps I should.

The other day, I was tired, irritable and took out my frustrations on the fruit flies infesting my house. As I ranted and raged, dear Twitch came up behind me, and before I could register what he was doing, told me to step aside. Within seconds..there was a roaring flame, a good foot long, delightfully scented of bergamont..and manliness..consuming in little flashes of flame those hated fruit flies. Twitch decided that his aerosol deoderant and a match would solve my problem. I wanted to yell at him, cause it wasn't a safe choice. But honestly, I was mesmerized by the roaring flame. And I was secretly gleeful as those tiny bursts of flame testified of the death of a fruit fly.

Autumn

I love fall! This morning, as I walked in the mild and freshly washed morning, I realized that this may be one of the last few mornings where the wind softly caresses me and feels like a friend. I am not really too sad, because I value the bracing and vigorous winds of winter too! I confess to being one of the odd ones who is excited for winter. I am not excited for the nasty roads and such, but if I could withdraw into fantasy world....

My ideal winter would blossom around me, sometimes mild, sometimes fierce, but never an enemy. Winter just has to do what it is on earth to do, to give our maples and seasonal plants a rest, and to just let there be balance in our northeastern world. See, in my little perfect world, I wouldn't have to run kids to school or seminary on a rotten day! During a raging storm, I could just snuggle up in a cozy little nest, and read, or sew, or do whatever my little heart desired! So long as I am fantasizing...a cozy, rosy fire as friend.

Really, if I didn't have to drive, I wouldn't have a single complaint against winter. On the coldest of days, there is the feathered masterpieces on the windows. On mild days, there is a smell like no other, cold and fresh and pure. What is more beautiful, intricate and pleasing than studying little snowflakes resting on your coat. I even love shoveling- sweating, heart pounding, arms trembling from exertion. I love feeling strong, stronger than mother nature, battling for my space to be clear and ready. I love the accomplishment of looking back over a driveway, clear and crisp, because of me. And what else is there to help you appreciate spring?

And, winter birds, they need us! I cannot lie...I love being needed. They come chirping and chattering, all the more on a cold day...to munch upon my meager offerings. I love the sound of them, coming to visit and feast, I love how they call their friend and family to join the party. Each day, there might be a new visitor to exclaim over, to study and give a name to. Each little feathered body is a work of art...unique and yet so similar. And, who cannot love the way they fluff and preen, always looking to keep their tiny bodies warm and cozy.

Ah...I am a dreamer...I am well aware of the ugliness that can come in winter, it is hard on all of us. But, it may be hard, but like little Frederick, if we store up warmth, beauty, poetry, and such, we can all make it. If we learn to look for the beauty in each day, you might even take the leap into crazyville with me, and love it!!!
(picture from Frederick, by Leo Leoni)

Settled In

Hey look, one single plant came of the aster seeds I planted, but isn't it glorious!

And this is only my second Gladiola. I will pull them this fall, and hopefully have better luck next year.

Well, I think we are all settled in to our school routine. It is very hectic first thing in the morning, and again after school, but in between, I am feeling like my day is pretty manageable. We are likely to stay poor, but at least I am sane, right?

I am not getting out for my "seminary" walk too often, cause my seminary guys are a bit inconsistent. But, I figure anything is better than what I have been doing. I must admit, though, that I have thought to myself, that if I can get up to get my fellas to seminary, why on earth can I not just get up and walk for myself!!! I will see about working on that!

Wooded Bliss

I went a walking this morning, while my boy was in seminary.(yes...singular...sadly) It was so so very nice. There are some lovely woods around the church house, and I just jumped in and explored. It was very nice. I am quite sure that I heard deer jumping away as I barrelled through their quiet morning spaces.

Other than that, not much going on. We are headed to greater poverty, as I seem to be losing children left and right. It is quite stressful, as we needed to ADD income, not lose it.

The garden is producing cucumbers at a rapid rate, and the girlies are trying to sell them at the road. We'll see if they get a bit of pocket change, or not!

Thursday Blues

Well...the good news is I walked a bit this morning. I can't really say that it was exercise, or aerobic, cause I had trouble starting, and was easily distracted by pretty things, but it was very very satisfying.

For example, look at this pretty waterway I found. I heard rushing water, and just had to find a way to get to it. It looks like fun to explore, but the edges are so very dense, I don't know if I will get very far, cause, of course, I will try tomorrow!

And look at the cool spiderwebs...there was a whole field of stacked webs..so pretty. The trees that lined the field were likewise adorned. I found it vaguely discomforting to think of so many spiders in the world.

I do wonder...why, oh why, are there so many hills where I live? It makes for a tough start for an out of shape wanna be walker!

Well, I have to be honest. Today was very very very hard. I had my new little lady, who was understandably irritable. (nursing babe, teacher parents, 9 mos)

The morning merry-go-round is going to be where I need to figure some things out. Especially when Seminary starts. Conan needs to leave for work at 6:45. Right now...he can bring the girls.(If I stay at seminary and walk....the girls will be needed to tend our ML until I get back at 7:00) Then, when Seminary starts...I would have to run them to school, lickety-split, to be back for childcare. At 7:15 my little friends start arriving. Then, at 7:50, the school girls (childcare) must be at the bus...but the boys need to be to school no later than 8. (on some days, that will entail loading three little people in the car...I have done it before....Can I do it again!!????) Now..if the bus is right on time...this will be fine. But if it is late, as it was today, I will have to run the fellas to school, and continue on to the girls' school, to keep the boys from being late.

Then, peace will reign, and Conan will do the afternoon shift of running everyone everywhere and home.

So..what to do? Do I give up walking?...then I would have to go back and forth twice to the church, and bring ML the second time. I want to walk, and winter is coming...I do not want to get ML up everyday.

Ideally, the boys will make some really nice, safe friends with a car, and get a ride to school...that would REALLY help!

They can walk, if the weather is decent, but it is quite a walk..not just a block or two. I don't like that option.

Or do I just wait for the bus?...and if it is a tad late, they may be a tad late, but the world wouldn't end if they were. That would save me the childcare school run.

Ack!!! what to do??!

Back to School

Everyone goes back to school today! (well, except a High School guy) I will miss having them around and having a more relaxed schedule.

However, having everyone out of the house will allow me to have a more manageable schedule throughout the day.

However, getting everyone to everywhere may just drive me crazy. We have three different school schedules to work out...High School, Elementary School, and Middle School. And, I had four little people to juggle while I did it all today. Yikes.

This will be an opportunity to grow and learn about preparedness and organization. (Sounds just like me, huh!?)

Gratitude and humility

I was having a chat with my husband the other day...about gratitude, and how gratitude affects our outlook on life. Are we grateful for what we have, or are we grumbly about what we don't have?

This morning, as I was driving my boy to work...I saw several people walking, who caught my attention. One was a young boy...pants down low...walking with an annoying cocky sort of a walk. I first thought "what a dope" but then as I watched him, he reached out and hit a tree...just in the way my boys do when they are hurt and sad...then he reached up and rubbed his eyes. Suddenly, I wondered what sort of pain was in his life...what made him dress in a way to attract attention, to prove he is tough and doesn't care. I wondered what was making him sad this morning. I felt sad for him, and thankful that I have had such a lucky and blessed life.

Another was a girl whose bent and twisted body contorted with every step. For her, not only does every day present possible challenges, but every single step, an obstacle to overcome. I felt humility and gratitude. Challenges we may all have, but are we grateful for those things that come easy, like walking? Do we reach out to help others whose burdens out weigh ours?

“Be thou humble; and the Lord thy God shall lead thee by the hand, and give thee answer to thy prayers” (D&C 112:10).

Happiness

I have a dream forming in my mind. It is of the place I will live when I am rich and famous and retired. It will be on the coast of Maine, a small and tidy cottage, looking out over the ocean, surrounded by gardens bursting with color and nestled not too far from the trees. I will sit on my porch, resting in the tickling caresses of the ocean breezes, on a calm day! And on a stormy day, I will revel in the powerful play of the wild wind, stirring the air and my soul. Since a concern has been voiced about the tick population, my yard will be tended by tick eating guinea hens...dutifully scratching and pecking the ticks away.


You know...I am feeling pretty happy these days. Childcare has been very quiet...the calm before the storm...without a doubt.

Yesterday, I experimented with a super duper new blender I received for my Birthday. Fruit smoothies...twice! (once for the girls...early...once for the sleepy boys..later)

We used blueberries, strawberries, banana...cantaloupe...yogurt and milk...vanilla..YUM!!!

Wednesday

Good Morning Friends and Family,
Not much has been going on...except the usual mayhem and frantic pace of keeping up with five children.

But I have started to feel some direction in my life, and I don't think it will be easy, but it has the potential of being good.

I have decided to stick with childcare, and upon making that decision, have had call after call of new families. I have a babe, who will start with the start of school. Then I am meeting with a mother and children today...three school age boys!!!! YIKES!! But...I am going to be clear that I would like a two week trial, and I will have to be honest and strong if it doesn't work!

Last night I submitted the request to cut back hours at JC Penneys...and hopefully, if they honor that, I will only work Fridays and Saturdays...and perhaps gather some extra hours through the holidays and covering for people from time to time.

I have a secret! I think that I will have time and a structure that will allow me to walk this fall. Ah the blessings of Seminary! I will have to have the boys there at 6, and they will need a ride home at 7...I am pretty excited that there will be a structure that will allow me to take care of my body. What happens after that??? I am a little stressed about how to get everyone everwhere and be here for childcare arrivals etc....but "line upon line..."

Delicious treasures

Look at this! I have been drooling over this dress for months...watching as one by one they got sold. I don't have a little girl to shop for...it is too gorgeous to give away to just anyone...but since I had free money, and it was on clearance...I went for it!!!! OH PLEASE...someone have a little girl!

At work, sometimes you can get "Rupp Bucks" (Mr. Rupp is the store manager) You get them for being a very very good girl.(or boy I suppose) Well last night I got $15 worth! I decided to spend them on just fun things...without worrying about needs.
The silly outfit on the left is one I have been drooling over...cause it is just silly and fun. But I just could not justify the money. So, as a result, there was only a 3T...we will have to wait a very long time to see her in it. The one on the right is just sweet!

Saturday

Hey look! My project is pretty much almost done! We have been putting along doing this project, and the end is in sight. I just love it!


I don't know if any of you were aware, but this little area used to be broken and annoying drawers....Conan and the boys put in very very very nice shelves, that now can hold my pots and pans, baking stuff, and we saved two of the drawers. So very nice! Today, it should be mostly done. I will have some touch up work to do, and I hope Conan can add a little door over my new cupboard space! Then life will be SWEET!!!

Obsessive project

Well folks...I bet you have wondered what I have been up to! (at least I like to think that maybe you are that curious about me)

I got caught up in quite a project this week. I cleaned and cleaned and cleaned my basement. It sadly is still not done, but I got about half done, and enough that I could set up a sewing area. This was a large part of my motivation to do it. (It also was just stinky and dirty...needed to be done.)

So I set up my table, Miss Mayflower painted a yucky book shelf that was down there...I hung up unfinished projects...to inspire me. Some of them just need to wait until I have finances to finish...some just need my time.

So...my first project...I have a friend, who gave a gentle suggestion to try out cloth pads...as I have mentioned before. I was highly skeptical, but willing to give it a go. So as you know my first round was OK...super comfortable, but not so effective. I can't really afford to shop around...cause those buggers are expensive! But, I wanted to give it a fair chance...cause they were so soft and comfortable. And BTW...this is worth it to me, cause I can't stand tampons...so uncomfortable.

So in a crazy moment of lack of self control...I bought some lovely fabric, that can have many uses...but that I may use to make my own! That way I can experiment for far less. Last night I began. (and could not stop till it was finished, at nearly 2 a.m.! Oh I am crazy!) I actually did not start off my using my new fabric, but some stuff that I had around. BTW...it is blueberry fabric that I got to make my Grandmother Mary Lou a pretty bandage to go around her cancer site on her leg. She wanted something pretty to cover up the ugly bandaging.

So here is the process... First I studied the ones I received as a gift...I liked the one on the right cause it is so neat and tidy...So I started there.
But, I wanted something bigger, so I made some paper patterns, first just on white paper, till I got it the way I wanted it, then I made them from heavier paper, so I could trace around and reuse them if I wished.



So then I cut the pieces...one of the items that I think is needed for success is PUL...a waterproof material. I went to the re-store, hoping to find some. I think I may have, but I am not sure. My little Who girl has some diapers that are lovely, soft, pliable and very waterproof. The stuff I got was not so soft and pliable...so I know already that I am not going to use it again...the appeal of a cloth pad was its softness and comfort. I might have to indulge and actually buy some, but it is pricey.

The green stuff is the waterproof material. And I guess you can see that I used a regular pad to help guide my process as well.
So then I made a little insert...cause I am really worried about leaking. It is just made of a bit of an old towel...although I also added two layers of flannel as well..just in case.

I have to show my faithful companion...Wally.

And finally the finished and oh so pretty product. The prettiness is so appealing...I find the idea of having pretty things to look forward to in the midst of a generally unpleasant experience..quite nice!

So there it is...Ideally I will get some snaps...but for now I used a bit of Velcro...it won't stay though. I read online, as I looked at how others have done this...to use little channels..just like "real" pads. We will see how it works!

Oh...and look how cute it looks, all folded up and ready for service! (please ignore the yucky bathroom wall.. so much work to be done)